April 9, 2012
We celebrated my birthday this weekend. J treated me to dinner at my favorite Thai restaurant and then to see Ben Howard in concert.
I also got a vintage Nikon 35mm film camera.
And a photo shoot.
J: Let's take some photos. We should take some photos. I promise it will be simple and natural. Promise.
Me: Okay, but please please please be kind. I'm 38 now.
He was kind. Very kind. And gentle. I walked in the field and moved and drank up the sunshine. J never asked me to face the camera. He knew that would be asking for too much. He knows this isn't an easy birthday.
Holidays and birthdays aren't the same. Life isn't the same. I might look the same but i'm not the same. J's not the same. Family. Friendships. Relationships. Our marriage. Nothing is the same. But we're together. Thank God we have each other.
***Photos by my talented husband