February 28, 2012
My days have been slow and quiet. I sip tea, read magazines and listen to music. I put my feet up, take my hormones, folic acid and prenatal vitamins. I research, email and blog.
I've been thinking about this blog and how much it's changed. I think about how much my life has changed. I think about Liam. My son has been gone for nearly 7 months now. 7 months. I think about the little boy he would be today. "He would have been one handsome little guy". Those were my father's first words after he kissed Liam's forehead and feet. I think about all the hopes and dreams we had for him and for our family. We wanted to take Liam to China and Uruguay, to show him his roots and introduce him to his family overseas. We had such plans. Such confidence.
I think about life and I wonder what's next. J and I are heading into Friday's appointment with the hope for a chance. A second chance. Even through loss and pain and struggle, there is hope isn't there. A light at the end of the deep, dark tunnel. It's not always easy to see it, but i've opened up my heart again and it's there. The hope that is coming.
*** Thank you so much for checking in on me, for your messages, private emails and the hopes you've sent our way. I've been thinking about you too, old blog friends who have stuck by me and new blog friends whom i've been lucky to find along my way. I'm sincerely thankful for you guys.