January 15, 2013

reflecting.

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2012 was both hard and amazing at the same time.

When I reflect back, I can hardly believe how far i've come.

From a second failed IVF treatment in March to conceiving naturally 7 weeks later to threatening to miscarry at 6 weeks to cervical cerclage and 30 weeks of my life spent in bed.

What.a.journey.

What a crazy, terrifying, amazing, bittersweet journey.

//

The stitches that held my cervix closed and kept my second son safe in my womb were removed last week.

I walked out of the hospital with a smile on my face and a lump in my throat.

The removal was another hard and familiar step in this pregnancy.

Every day, every hour, every minute, as I grow this baby I think of Liam.

//

Contractions were strong last night and eased this morning.

My body is preparing for labor any day now.

We are ready to meet our second son.

//

Thank you so much to those who are checking in and thinking of us.

I'm sorry for being quiet here in this place of missing and hoping and waiting, and not really knowing how to articulate it all.

You can also find me over on Instagram if you'd like to join me there @Suite994.

34 comments:

  1. Sending so much love and happy thoughts to you guys. You're the most amazing women. Xx

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  2. What a journey, indeed. Sending love for the next parts of it...

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  3. I'm so deeply happy for you. I can't imagine 30 weeks in bed, but you did it!!

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  4. Hoping and praying for you Tash! Best wishes for the coming days. xx

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  5. oh wow. thanks for the update. You've been on my mind so much as this time draws near. Can't wait to see a photo of your Liam's wee little brother who will, hopefully, happily, and sadly grow bigger than him.
    Hugs to you dear mama.
    Em

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  6. I'm praying!
    xoxo
    Lulu

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  7. Sending love as you welcome Liam's little brother into your arms. Hugs!

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  8. Oh Tash, I'm here. Thinking of you and your... JOURNEY... this HUGE journey.

    THe lump in the throat is a new normal. "what is happening?" is a constant phrase I live in.

    I hope and pray for the best.
    I cant wait to hear more news when you're ready.

    Sending love

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  9. I will be thinking of you and waiting for news on your up and coming wonderful arrival xoxoxo

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  10. You're almost there! He is almost here! Think of you often, my friend. I can't wait to hear your happy news. xx

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  11. thinking of you always Natasha, in fact you have inspired me in so many ways, that i too wait for a bit of news.

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  12. Thanks for the update! I think of you often and wonder how you're doing. Breathing here with you. Waiting with hope and love <3

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  13. wishing you all the best possible outcome.

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  14. I look forward to each and every update in Reader! Praying you meet this little one soon.

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  15. Thanks for the update. Stay strong, brave mama
    xo

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  16. Thinking of you and Liam, and hoping to hear good news about his little brother's arrival soon. Much love to you all, xo

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  17. I clicked on this with anticipation when it first appeared in my blogroll. Takes me longer to come back and comment. ;)

    Thanks so much for the update. Thinking of you all and waiting, waiting too...

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  18. Oh Tash this is such beautiful news ..well done for your calm and patience ...not long now :) xxx

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    1. Thank you my friend. I will write back to you soon :) xx

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  19. KO from GlowJanuary 18, 2013

    Lovely new picture today! (Wink.) Boo-yah!

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  20. Oh Tash, you made it! He is so gorgeous and so big! A beautiful full-term baby. Congratulations! Surely big brother Liam is smiling down on the three of you.

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  21. Tash!!!! Looked on Instagram and There He IS!!!!!!!!

    Could there be a more beautiful sight in all the world...?

    Yes. Liam, right there - hugging you and his new brother.

    Your son is beautiful. And Liam is still missing and it still hurts - just as much.

    Every good thing there is, your way, I hope for.

    xoxoxo CiM

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  23. Oops, the last comment was mine and in my over the top exuberance, it had some lousy grammar. LOL.

    I just peeked on Instagram and wow, such sweetness. What a beautiful little face he has! Congrats to you on the safe arrival of Liam's little brother. Much love and ((HUGS)).

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  24. Also, inspired my previous commenters, had a sneaky peek on Instagram. Oh Tash. He is absolutely perfect. A little brother for Liam.

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  25. I came over to just to check and followed to Instagram and there he is! Beautiful boy! Beautiful name. Love to all four of you.

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  26. Love the name! Love your joy! Blessings to you all and such a relief for the prayers that worked to this point. Your journey has been amazing.....your life ahead will continue to be amazing! Big smiles for you all.

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  27. KO from GlowJanuary 26, 2013

    I didn't see his name the first time! That is my brother & my father's name! They pronounce it "life". Do you say "Lay-f"? Glad he's gaining weight!

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    1. We love the name Leif. Liam was close to being a Leif :) We pronounce it "Leef". I love it that both your dad and brother share the same name, that's beautiful :)

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  28. congratulations! i am so very happy for your family.

    Katerina ff
    Greece

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  29. Just saw the note for Instagram and saw his pic. He is gorgeous!!! I want to hug him xoxo

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  30. I've been thinking about you and am so glad I checked in and saw other comments about your new son! A baby brother. Hurray! Love to you and your boys xoxo.

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  31. Thank you so much to those who have been coming by here and Instagram for news. Leif Everett is here and i'm thankful that I get to be his mumma every single day.

    We are adjusting well over here and I can't wait to blog and post photos of my little dreamboat soon! xx

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  32. oh my goodness just found you, this is the first post i read and i am crying! 2 lost pregnancies, and then 1 lost twin threatening also to loose the second twin, which thank God never happened, this touched a nerve immediately. you my dear lady are in my prayers from now on in xxxxx

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